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29/05/2011

Tomi's Wisdom

Ah my boy!  Over the years I've received some priceless comments from Tom,
three of them below.

"Papa?  - Racing cars
never really get
anywhere do they?

(Tomi Evans-Krings, 4 years old)


Excited:  "PAPA !!!!  -
I know how you make paper!  
Make the screen all white . . .
and then print it out!"

(Tomi Evans-Krings, 5 years old)


"But  . . . .  the next
thing you do is
wash your hands!!"


Just seen a UK TV advert for a 'non-touch' soap dispenser
(to avoid getting ALL THOSE GERMS from a dispenser top)
 

(Tomi Evans-Krings, 13 years old)

25/05/2011

The Queen, Kate, Obama and the Essential Ash Cloud

An exhausted Michelle - stranded at Edinburgh, keeps her head down as the Ash cloud settles.


What a fantastically cohesive response this essential relationship provided to the renewed threat from Iceland's Grimsvotn volcano - spewing its poisonous, plane-ripping swirls of ash into the midnight sky!

FANTASTIC!  The Queen, only back less than a day from her essential trip to Eire to see Michael O'Leary, Ryan Air boss (he personally oversees every single flight with his name on it, so over-worked for the state occasion that he forgot to say 'yes' to an Edinburgh flight stranded on the ash-spewn tarmac).
But she doesn't stop there - oh no . . . our Monach speeds back to blighty, where her and the newly weds greet Pres Obama and Michelle on their essential trip to the UK.  The relationship this mighty team create is described on BBC TV news reports as 'Essential' - and to make sure no-one worried too much, we were told this SEVEN times in ONE five-minute session during the 6pm news.

Essentially, Obama brings 1,500 helpers with him to the UK - each with a 1 Ltr bottle of Evian water. - They circle a stricken reservoir in Ryan Air-force ONE, open a fan-light in the toilet and pour the contents out - thus ending the possibility of a summer-long drought in ash-torn UK.   Monies collected from this action (toilet fees to Ryan Air) will be distributed amongst Icelandic banking refugees in the coming weeks.

That'll show them eh?  Send up an Ash cloud would you?  Eh ... eh? Well take THAT!  We have our Queen, Ireland, president Obama , Michelle, Kate, Will  - we're READY buddy!  We're stood over here, on UK territory and you just see if that essential ash cloud can doing anything now ... haha ...... think you're big don't you eh?  Think you can float over here do you?, building all over our women, raping our jobs ..... ha!  You'll SEE, we're ESSENTIAL we are.

15/05/2011

Eurovision

Well, I watched the last hour or so - and what a fantastic show, a seriously amazing set - and annoyingly all one week before I land in Dusseldof myself.

Norton Kills the Joy
Still in some sort of 1990's national state-of-mind concerning Eurovision, Mr Graham Norton is in serious danger of appearing so yesterday (as I'm sure he probably described some dress, some hair, some dance - whatever, last night) by inserting sneering little jibes into each and every appearance of anything that he thinks we can snigger at.  "Haha - he's only 59 years old, he looks like he's 90 - hahaha"

Still doing it aren't we? Still being taught to sneer at everything, to use trivial non-commenting as if it's humour.
Stop it Mr Norton, European countries out perform the UK in everything nowadays, every day of every week.  And if some of them do this whilst remaining so yesterday - then thank God, because today's UK style, as populated by people like you - can only ever be NULS POINTS.